I'm Ok With Being a MoM

So today was one of those days that I needed to have.   I should be blogging about my wonderful children and their first day of school or the soccer game ect.  But instead I need a little Me time.  A few days ago I had a call from an old colleague asking me to join them in SLC for some Hunter Douglas Training.  (For anyone who doesn't know I use to manage a furniture store in Nephi where I sold Hunter Douglas Blinds.   I kept the account and sell blinds every now and then.  Mostly to Dan's costumers, friends, and family.)  I told Chris I just don't know I need to be here with my kids it is their first week of school.  So I had decided not to go until the first day of school.  Kaci and Cort had fallen asleep and it was just me.  I didn't know what to do.  (really there is plenty to do here laundry, dishes, ect.ect.ect)  I was   caught off guard  by the quiet so I called my mom and she agreed to take Kaci and I decided I could go to SL and be back by the time the boys got out of school.  Seems like a logical plan.  So this morning Dan and Kaci headed to Fillmore,  I took the boys to school and headed to SL.  I was so sick to my stomach.  I hadn't been alone in a  very long time and then I was driving in traffic!!!!   I kept thinking you did this once a week with a truck and trailer get a grip.  I talked to my sister Becky once for directions and Brenda once for moral support and made it safe and sound.   I was greeted by a warm welcome  back into the Career World.  Everyone was so complimentry.   I wasn't called mean or told I Hate you once.  So after spending a few hours in a different world it was time to head home and I was  back on top of the ladder.  I was thinking of all kinds of scenario's in my head of how to make it work with me having a career and being a mom.   Then I made a detour and started down Redwood road.  If you have been on this road at all this summer it is a mess. CONSTRUCTION ZONE.   Then something hit me hard (not literally) I had a sign jump out and say Danger, Fines double for Speeding, Warning. Caution.  Then there was a man holding a stop sign.   I stopped at Walmart and went in for some puncture proof bike tires for the boys and then the signs all made sense.  I got a call from my boys mom where are you it is early day and the doors are locked we are at Tina's.  ( that is where the flaw in my plan came dang early day it gets me every time.  Thanks Tina for bailing me out I owe you one! lol)  So from the top of the Career Ladder straight to the bottom with a loud crash.  The signs smacking me all the way down.   I decided Career Mom is not me.  I need to be where I am.  A mom who is home with the doors unlocked for her kids to come home to.   I find comfort in knowing that I still have the career drive and that I could go back if I have to.  But for now I need to be where I am.  I look up to other moms who are home, I look up to other moms who are Career Moms and make it work.   It is tough being a mom and it is such a sacred role with so much weight that it seems almost impossible to bear somedays.   I think that it is hard to choose and sometimes we unfortunately don't get a choice on just being a mom.  So here is to all the moms in my life.  My mom who was always home, my grandma, who had an awesome career and shared that with me, my mother-in-law who is a teacher and mom to many,   My sisters and sister-in-laws.  My many friends to many to name with out getting myself in a lot of trouble.   Keep it up and make it work no matter what Zone you are in make sure that Mom Zone is at the top. One of the last things I learned today is there is no room to judge, everyone's situation is so different and so personal they have to make it work for them and what makes their life and family life Happy.   Here's to all the MOMS I know, I Love you all, it's a tough job but someone has to do it! lol  Thanks for all of the great expamples I have all around me. Most of all Thanks Dan for your love and continued support.  I know if I would have come home and told you I was going back to work you would have supported me.  THANKS for making it possible for me to be at home.  Here is to my career, Mom of 3 wonderful children.  If I never get my other career back I can say that I am OK with that.  

(This is a touchy post to write and I am treading on vulenerable waters, but I really do hope all who read this feel the sincerety in my thoughts and feelings.   That you find strength and comfort as I did today!)